


Thor's Diary

by SatansSin



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Diary, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Mpreg, Thor is a sweet idiot, loki is still a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-16
Updated: 2014-04-10
Packaged: 2018-01-15 22:39:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1321855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SatansSin/pseuds/SatansSin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor uses the quill to put his feelings to paper.</p><p>This is a self indulgent fic I don't know why I love it so much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dear Diary.  
Tonight I have decided to meet Loki under the safety of shadows. He will wait for me at the fountain under the … actually, I’d rather not say. Who knows who can read this. I shall now be discreet. Excuse me.  
Dear Diary.  
Tonight I have decided to meet ~~Loki~~ under the safety of shadows. He will wait for me at the fountain under the ~~golden arch~~ built by my father. I am so excited. I am hopeful for ~~sex~~ but I will respect his wishes should he not want to. I packed a picnic dinner for him. He likes sweet ices and I like licking them off ~~him~~.  
Wish me luck, Diary.  
Note to self: Give Diary a real name.

Dear Diary.  
I will now call you Thorki.  
See what I did there?

Dear Thorki.  
Last night was a disaster. Loki didn’t like the picnic. He didn’t like the sweet ices. He wanted only sex and he jumped on me and took my length into his slick channel. I tried not to cry but it was so good that I think I might have shed a tear or two.  
Then he laughed at me and called me the Thorbaby.  
And he stole my briefs  
I am too upset to be secretive.  
I’m going to ~~cry~~ now.

Dear Thorki.  
It has now been three days since I last wrote in you.  
I did not mean to ignore you, but Sif insisted she wanted to go to the healers and check her lady parts. I was not invited.  
It is not fair.  
I have seen her lady parts.  
I have seen the lady parts of her friends, too. But that was before we were married.  
I was not allowed inside, but I feel something is happening. I am worried.  
When she came out, it felt like a hundred years had gone by and I was still not told what was wrong. I tried to ask her but she only smiled at me and told me all will be well.  
I wanted to go get sweet ice, but she wanted to go see her parents. She made me tag along and we went to her parents. They made me feel embarrassed and her father forced me to eat his wife’s hand made cookies.  
They tasted terrible but I had them because Sif was glaring at me.  
Her glares are terrifying.  
I hope never to receive one again.  
We went home after dinner and made love all night.  
I didn’t get my ice.

Dear Thorki.  
Sif is pregnant.  
Excuse me while I pass out.

Dear Thorki.  
Father passed.  
I am to become the youngest King in over ten thousand years.  
I am frightened. Other than you and Loki, no one knows.  
I can’t do this.  
I can’t be a father and rule a kingdom.  
I can’t.

Dear Thorki  
I ran away from my own coronation.  
I can’t go back.

Dear Thorki  
It has been weeks since I last wrote and the events I will summarize for you.  
I was afraid of becoming king and Father. I was stupid and selfish and it took a friend to tell me that.  
After I ran off, with nothing with me but you and a quill to record my actions, I was found.  
Loki found me and he hit me a couple of times to knock sense into me and dragged me back. I cussed at him the whole way back but he didn’t let me go. He told me I was stupid and an idiot and I was selfish.  
He dragged me before all Asgard and threw me to get crowned.  
Sif clapped for him.  
And it was only later that I realized how grateful I was.  
I am now King.  
And peasants are whiny.

Dear Thorki.  
I have now resigned myself to listening to the peasants whine. They talk about things I didn’t know about. I lower taxes, they complain, I raise taxes, the complain harder.  
I am going to ~~Loki~~.  
Also, Sif is going to have a baby.

Dear Thorki.  
Loki called me the Thorbaby again and sent me back. He will not have visitors.  
I bet his peasants do not whine.

Dear Thorki  
Sif had a boy.  
I am a father.  
Loki returned my briefs. They are now filled with frost bite. I cannot wear them.

Dear Thorki  
We named him Balder.  
He controls light.  
He’s beautiful.  
He’s mine.  
My son, Balder.

Dear Thorki  
I wish to change your name.  
Your new name is Angrbodasucks  
I hate that dick.

Dear Angrbodasucks.  
I love your name already.  
And Loki got married.  
To a dick.  
I didn’t go.  
And now my brother hates me

Dear Angrbodasucks.  
Forgive me, I must change your name again.  
This one speaks ill of me.  
I will name you Thor.  
So I can talk to myself as I die here alone, listening to the peasants whine.

Dear Thor  
I like addressing myself.  
Possibly more than I should.

Dear Thor  
I have not written in you for over a year now. I apologize. Things have changed unexpectedly and something exciting has happened.  
Loki is leaving Angrboda.  
The Jotun was not to his taste and may have done something to anger Loki far too much. He told us he is leaving him and coming back home.  
You cannot fathom how happy I am.

Dear Thor.  
Loki is pregnant  
Loki is Jotun

Dear Thor  
Loki will not come out of his room. He had a fight with Mother and she told me they adopted him.  
He was never my brother.

Dear Thor  
I am changing your name again.  
Or not.  
No I am not  
Sorry

Dear Thor  
Loki is not letting me in. I begged him to come out but he didn’t.  
Apparently he heard of my less than graceful reaction to learning of who he is. He is convinced I do not love him, that I cannot love a Jotun. He hurls things in his room and screams a lot.  
I am worried about him and I fear I take it out on things that should be left alone.

Dear Thor  
They are still trying to get the food off the ceiling, I am ashamed to say.  
Mother banned me from the dining hall.  
I will not flip tables again.  
I will eat in my room and be grateful for what Mother gives me.  
But I will not be grateful for carrots

Dear Thor  
Four months have passed and I have not met with you.  
Let me give you the most important thing I can.  
Loki opened the door for me.

Dear Thor  
We kissed  
And I have an erection


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Thor  
Sadly, I have to change your name. I realized, upon further contemplation ~~and a quick search through what I want to call us in secret~~ that naming you Thor is sweet, on my behalf, but I cannot talk to myself for one simple reason.  
I hate books.  
So now you are Sweet Thunderfrost.  
Is that not a lovely name?  
Yes, it is.  
You cannot have a say.  
You are a book.  
But not the bad kind.  
Loki made fun of me today.  
His words hurt me.  
More than him groping my arse in public and telling me there was a bug there.  
One does not grab a bug, one smacks it.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki smacked my arse in public.  
I have only myself to blame.  
Is it not a coincidence that he did it three days after I mentioned it to you? I found mirth in my posterior pain.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Today Loki allowed me to accompany him to his trip to the healers.  
I got to see the insides of a Jotun and it astounded me.  
Loki had the most perfectly shaped uterus I have ever seen and I told him so.  
Obviously he did not like it and would have lashed out at me had the healer not announced that he was having a little girl.  
My brother.  
A father.  
I cannot be happier

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Sif wants us to go away together for a week.  
The strain of being a mother seems to be getting to her and I do not wish to have the woman’s lethal glare upon me so I agreed.  
Loki did not take it well.  
I think he wants me to leave Sif, which I cannot do.  
Oh, and he and I are having an affair.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I have returned from my trip.  
It was hectic, we travelled and saw things I had no interest in but pretended to like because they were important to Sif.  
We ate Vanahiem’s food, which made me feel like a rabbit, and now I long to jump on a boar whether it be alive or dead, just to get the feel of meat between my teeth.  
I will never complain at the dinner table again.  
Also, Loki is huge.  
I wish I hadn’t said that to him.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I do not think I can do this.  
I have to break it off.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I am a coward. I should have said it to his face, I wanted him to stop but…  
…I think I love him.  
More than a brother, more than a friend, I am _in_ love with him.  
I do not know what to do

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I have been lax in my desire to keep you a secret.  
 ~~I will have to break either Sif’s heart or Loki’s for I cannot be with them both~~  
I hate this

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
It has been four months since I last wrote in you and I am ashamed to say, I am still in two relationships that are killing me.  
I have to put an end to it with him.  
 ~~Pray he does not casterate me~~

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I am the worst being in all nine realms!  
I told Loki I wanted to end it and he looked at me as though I was a monster! I will never forget his face!  
Also, I may have induced his early labor.  
 ~~Pray he does not kill me~~

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
The child was born dead.  
Loki is devastated.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Never have I been this helpless.  
Never have I cried so much.  
I cannot breathe, such is the pain Loki’s loss has brought upon me. He is a mere shade of who he used to be and I am dying inside because he will not accept my comfort.  
Norns, I beg he be alright.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Father intervened.  
But it is not as we all hoped.  
The girl is called Hela. She is neither living nor dead. She calls Loki ‘Father’ and is set to rule over the dead as Queen. She is beautiful.  
And she has Loki’s eyes.  
But Loki is still devastated.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki is still not talking to me.  
It has been over a month and now he is strong enough to move about and can walk long distances before he feels faint.  
I tried to talk to him but he refuses to listen, I do not know what to do.  
Tonight, I will barge into his room to make sure he listens to me.  
I pray for luck.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki slapped me.  
It did not hurt, but it did at the same time.  
I do not want to cry, but I can’t seem to stop.  
I want to cry because this past year has been awful to me.   
Oh, Balder called me Father today.  
It was his first word.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I do not deserve this pain.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I wish Loki would just look at me, just once, if only to hit me again, but he doesn’t.  
He keeps looking at that man, that Svadilfari he keeps around himself.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Balder and I sat in the throne all day.  
The past weeks are forgotten in the happiness I had when my child squealed and laughed in my grip while silencing those peasants.  
They still whine.  
But Balder makes them coo instead.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I made a mistake.  
I told a peasant it is no concern of mine that they don’t have food. He should have thought of that before he became a peasant.  
There is a familiarity to that sentence, I cannot tell where I had heard it, but it seemed like a good idea to use it at the moment.  
Of course, I was wrong

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Yzma

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki and Svadlifari have been together for a long time now.  
They gawk and grope and I want to punch him.  
So bad

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost.  
Loki is about to kill me, I know it!  
He will skin me alive for what I have done and I must hide

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I _am_ now ~~hiding~~ in my **wardrobe**.  
 ~~My writing it terrible to read~~.  
 ~~But~~ if I _go_ out, _Loki_ will find me.  
He prowls the room.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I’m found

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
The door creaked open and scared the life out of me.  
Oh, and Loki is not amused.  
He has made it so that I cannot talk without my rear releasing hideous gas into a room.  
After bearing it for one day, everyone told me to shut up.  
My thunderous trumpeting is too much for their ears and the ungodly stench is too much for me.  
I will not speak.  
Not even when spoken to.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Svadilfari just attacked Loki.  
The spell has worn off but my rage is still upon me.  
I do not know what I will do, though Father has forbidden me to.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost.  
I killed Svadilfari

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Father was not happy at what I did but he was coaxed, possibly by both Loki and mother to be silent and not do anything.  
Loki is alright, the bastard did not get far.  
And he kissed me.  
I don’t it want to be, but it’s standing up again.  
 ~~Understand what I implied, Book~~


	3. Epilogue

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki suggested he and I go on a hunting trip. I am very nervous because I know we will not hunt anything. He plans to have sex with me.  
I have no had sex since Sif turned pregnant.  
I am afraid I will put things in places they don’t go in.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I am taking you with me to the hunting trip to record what we pass and where we go. It doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that I am scared Loki will jump and hump.  
No  
I am not scared

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I’m so scared.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I have found a rather colorful bunch of Amaryllis today. It was beautiful and the crimson on it was just one of the most beautiful colors I had ever seen.  
Loki made fun of me the entire way.  
Then the worst happened  
I saw a pink Anthurium.  
Loki turned my love of botany to my love of the erotic and he was loud, obnoxious and I wanted to punch him.  
Not everything is about sex!  
Right?

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
We have reached the site.  
It is by a large lake and Loki is already swimming beneath the surface. He looks beautiful, I want to make love to him.  
I think he knows

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki is withholding sex and I am sleeping outside our tent tonight.  
To put it in a less vulgar manner, I am taking my sexual frustration out with the help of Mrs. Palmer and her five daughters.  
 ~~Understand that, please, don’t make me explain it~~

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
You cannot imagine me mirth at coming across you.  
I have been reading you for the past half hour and I am in gales of laughter.  
Thor is the best author in the world and I cannot fathom what you went through.  
I wipe my eyes as I write this, unable to help myself.  
He is a fool, a sentimental fool that left you outside for me to trip on, and how could I not read you!? it was a temptation too strong for me and I think I will enjoy seeing his reaction when he sees that I know.  
Yes, Thor, I _know_!  
So do Mrs. Palmer and her five daughters can you be any more of a vulgar idiot?  
I would have used the help of Master Bates if I were you, that blunt style is more your

Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki has violated the sanctity of our bond.  
I tackled him as he wrote in you.  
We had a fight and he was beaten, pushed into the ground as I sat upon him.  
I was about to win, to have my victory and make him apologize.  
But …  
He kissed me.  
And I finally had sex.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
I remembered where to put it  
I will insert a smiling face here.  
See this : )  
I make : for the eyes and ) for the smile  
Look : )  
And L : D  
And then this ; )  
That one means I got lucky.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Up all night to get Loki ….  
Forgive me

Thunderfrost

It is I, Loki, again.  
He left me so Thor last night.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost

Ha, Brother! That is what you get for being taken down by the mighty Thor!

Thunderfrost

Must I write the name of this lame book?

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost

It is my life. Respect this lady

Thor,  
It’s a book

LOKI!  
Address her properly!

Thor,  
Can we not just address each other? It’s must more normal.

Loki,  
When have you been normal?

Thor,

When you started to write like a little girl!

Loki!  
I am not a little girl!

Thor,  
You squeal like one.

Loki!!

LOKI!!!

Thor,  
I laugh at you.  
Also, I want to meet you behind the stables.

Loki,  
Do not be mean.  
And whatever for?

Thor,

I am wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.  
You have wasted enough time. Meet me outside an hour after dinner.

Loki,  
SORRY! I SWEAR I DID NOT FORGET!

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost

I am high on sex!!

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost,

This is Loki writing.  
I think – at great risk – that I am and will be…  
…in love

Loki,  
I love you too

Thor,  
Shut up.

Dear Sweet Thunderfrost  
Loki stands before you again.  
And so does my … IT


End file.
